We live in a culture that celebrates femininity and criticizes manliness.

If you need proof, look no further than the drastic increase in popularity of cats over dogs.*

Cats, for the sake of argument, are the model of femininity. Soft. Dignified. They purr when you cuddle them. They keep their bathrooms neat. They plot against you if you ignore them for too long.

Dogs, specifically puppies, are the epitome of maleness. They’re full of energy and often fail to direct it appropriately. They pee on the floor and slobber all over things they want. They’re loyal and will sacrifice anything for you. I’ve never heard of a guard cat.**

Women are refined, emotionally superior, and elegant. There’s probably a reason we call some men ‘dogs.’

The differences between men and women are fodder for numerous sermon jokes, but it’s simply true. Men and women are different. That’s why the jokes are funny. They’d be stupid if we didn’t all know they were accurate.

For a better anecdote, why do you think we tell men that they “need to get in touch with their feminine side” while never saying the opposite to women?

Ask a psychologist someday why she doesn’t ask women to “get in touch with their masculine side.” I’m sure she’ll appreciate the joke.

The truth is, we are different. Not better, just different.

It’s how we were created. Men and women were created to be unique, complementary beings (see Genesis 1:27). I believe it’s because the fullness of God’s characteristics can’t exist in the limited nature of a single human being. We need both men and women to fully understand God.

So why does the church follow the culture and pretend we’re all the same? More importantly, why does the American church assume we’re all women?

In a time when movies like Gladiator, Braveheart, and Saving Private Ryan are in every guy’s top 5 list – we have reduced Christianity to inspirational quotes. We’ve turned the physical presence of the Gospel, the Church, into a Lifetime version of itself.***

No wonder men don’t want anything to do with it.

It’s dull and there’s nothing for us there. We think we’ll have to sit around and get in touch with our feelings. Our experience has taught us that, if we’re to fit in, we have to act more like our wives.

We were made for more than that.

We were made for adventure.

And we kill it so early.

We expect red-blooded boys to sit still and answer questions in Sunday School given by their female Sunday School teachers. If they don’t, they’re criticized or marginalized. Their female classmates often outshine them in this setting (due to their very nature and developmental patterns). Boys grow up equating church to school without recess (so really, what’s the point?)

If the kids last, youth group gives them another shot – and it’s usually better.**** But even then we’re never taught to take chances and step out in faith. We’re often taught to toe the company line – and whatever you do, don’t have sex. You might get an STD.

The Gospel is strong. It’s a story of sacrifice. It’s a story of a man who was God giving everything and igniting a movement that would last millennia. It appeals equally to the meekest, quietest woman to the loudest, roughest man. Why can’t we tell that story? Why do we insist on teaching men to be quiet, sit still, and wait their turn?

Now I’m not suggesting men be pigs. We’re taught to love our wives (because it’s unnatural for us) and that’s what they need. In the same passage, our wives are taught to respect their husbands (because it’s unnatural for them) and that’s what we need. In order to do that we need to both rise above our tendencies and be completely submitted to Christ and to each other.

It’s just that we’re in a love dominated culture – and the Church is no different.

If men are from mars, and women are from venus – the Church’s primary language is Venutian.

And that’s too bad for a lot of guys out there.

I long to see a the American church full of men who lead. A Church full of fathers, husbands, boyfriends, and friends who love, discipline, pray, study, A Church where the good women are equalled (or even outnumbered) by the good men. A Church where we can both proudly display our gender as an example of the God who sacrificed it all for us. THE Church.

*completely made up statistic
**only a scaredy cat
***ok, so some of the Lifetime stories would be perfectly suited for the New Testament church
****unless the cheese factor is too high. I once met a youth pastor who wore nothing but orange. He collected something new and orange on every youth trip. He looked ridiculous and I wanted to be nothing like him.
*****because I don't want to plagiarize, I was heavily influenced by this excellent article. You should read it. It's better than my little rant here.
******I feel the need to say that I'm really happy to be serving the church I'm serving. Rock Bridge gets it.

I just wanted to share a little bit from my heart (really our hearts) as it relates to the future of our small groups.

As many of your know, Matt has been challenging our church to go deeper and for each of our members and attenders to take on more ownership as we move forward. This is based on two crystallizing thoughts.
1. We want to recapture the priesthood of the believer. As a follower of Christ, you have everything you need to be huge part of the kingdom of God. In terms of ability to channel the power of God in your life and in the lives of others, there is no difference between you, me, Matt, or the members of your group. It is, in fact, God IN us that gives us that power – not ourselves. With that in mind, we want to empower the congregation to live out their faith in powerful ways.
2. We want to be a people reflecting Luke 15. In these verses, God is consistently chasing after the lost. He ignored the 99 who are already safe in order to chase the 1 who is running away. This MUST be the heart of our church – to seek after the 1.

With this in mind, we want our groups to grow in two ways.
1. We want our groups to grow by planting and multiplication. In order to reach those in our church who need community and discipleship, we need more groups. Our staff team will be calling members of your groups in the next few weeks who we believe are ready to lead a group themselves. Please do not be offended by this. We do not want to steal your people. We do, however, want to see the kingdom of God expand. Please let us know if you know of people we should be calling.
2. We want our groups to grow deeper. So many groups are right where they should be – living life together and digging deep by living out the truths of the Bible that they uncover every time they meet. However, many of our groups have turned into nothing more than social clubs with no desire to grow. Most of us don’t need more friends, we need friends who are willing to “die on the hill” with us in order to see Christ glorified in our lives.

Please join me in praying for these two things. Our goal is to see 125 healthy, thriving small groups by 1/25/11. Should be easy to remember: 125 by 1/25.

You are a tremendous blessing to me, both individually and as a group. I love serving God alongside of each of you. I pray that God will bless your group beyond your wildest dreams. Thank you for serving.

I keep having this recurring daydream where the entire United States economy collapses onto itself and I can no longer afford to buy diapers.

Call it a daymare perhaps.

I know it’s based in fear. It’s certainly not based in trust and commitment to God’s goodness and love. It’s a fear that my security will be ripped from me leaving me powerless to support and care for my family.

Many of our fellow Americans are already living this nightmare.

For them, the nightmare is a reality. Everyday they must wonder how they’re going to make it to the next. Stumbling from one place to another searching for jobs…

Powerless.
Impotent.
Without hope.

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Despite all the affected teenage rebellion, I continued to call myself a Christian into my early twenties. When I finally stopped, it wasn’t because being a believer made me uncool or outdated or freakish. It was because being a Christian no longer meant anything. It was a label to slap on my Facebook page, next to my music preferences. The gospel became just another product someone was trying to sell me, and a paltry one at that because the church isn’t Viacom: it doesn’t have a Department of Brand Strategy and Planning. Staying relevant in late consumer capitalism requires highly sophisticated resources and the willingness to tailor your values to whatever your audience wants. In trying to compete in this market, the church has forfeited the one advantage it had in the game to attract disillusioned youth: authenticity. When it comes to intransigent values, the profit-driven world has zilch to offer. If Christian leaders weren’t so ashamed of those unvarnished values, they might have something more attractive than anything on today’s bleak moral market. In the meantime, they’ve lost one more kid to the competition.

Now that’s a truly insightful statement. Don’t back off the truth. Your authenticity and love make all the difference in the world.

To read more: http://www.guernicamag.com/features/2874/meghan_ogieblyn_7_15_11/

from Megan Pulver.

Oprah’s spiritual views are often said to make people feel good about themselves, so naturally, they’re appealing.  She claims that we find our spiritual power by getting in touch with our inner selves. But what does Jesus say? Is it our inner self that provides us with the wisdom and power to live a God-honoring life – or is it something else?

Jesus says, “I will ask the Father, and he will give you another advocate to help you and be with you forever— the Spirit of truth. The world cannot accept him, because it neither sees him nor knows him. But you know him, for he lives with you and will be in you.”

Of course we want to live by our feelings. It’s comfortable, makes sense, doesn’t ask us to wait, trust, or surrender all. But, we’re not called to live by our feelings. We’re called to live by the knowledge of a true God and that can be very uncomfortable. “Jesus says, ‘You shall know the truth’ – not get in touch with your inner self – and the truth will set you free.” As Christians, when we focus on feelings without thinking through God’s truths, we are lead astray.

It’s natural to live off feelings of doubt, fear, weakness, loneliness, etc. But what would it look like if we instead, lived off God’s truths:

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